Crash the Car. Earn the Jackpot.
A tragic tale of automotive damage, moral damage, and one extremely helpful sibling with flexible ethics
My mother shouted at my younger brother, “Shut up!”
My father followed with his rants. “You are such an idiot.”
My brother looked terrified. My parents screamed as if they were going to beat the hell out of him.
That’s rude and mean!
They didn’t even wait for me to join them.
For the trash talk.
My brother explained how the truck driver on the other end thrashed his car. He was innocent; he claimed.
My father disregarded his claims, snatched the car keys, and vowed never to lend his car to my brother.
That’s sad!
Now I have to find another way to trick my brother into refilling the car so I can drive it without worrying.
My mother regained her sanity.
Pretty soon, if you ask… my dad.
Pretty lucky, if you ask… my brother.
Pretty bad, if you ask… me.
Mother looked worried and asked, “How’s the truck driver who hit your car?”
“He is fine,” my brother said, still trying to fake a sad face.
“Are you sure he is fine?” I looked at him. He nodded.
“Thank God,” my mother heaved a sigh of relief.
That’s a relief!
Now I can force the truck driver to press charges against my brother.
My father stared at my brother and said, “Great. Now you can fix my car.”
“But Dad, it’s expensive. I don’t have that kind of money,” he looked down.
I raised a brow. “Have you hidden any money in the ground?”
“What?” my brother looked at me.
“Then why are you looking at the ground? Just look at Father and tell him,” I shook my head. “Tell him you’ll spend the money on buying your girlfriend expensive gifts rather than fixing the car.”
My mother regained her insanity. Her eyes widened, and she asked, “He has a girlfriend?”
My brother’s eyes popped.
That’s not good!
I expected her to kill him.
My brother shook his head rapidly.
“What’s her name?” Mom asked.
“Priti,” I blurted, before my brother could deny it.
“No… her name is Neha,” my brother retorted and instantly regretted it. “See? I told you he has a girlfriend.” I smirked.
Mother gasped.
That’s disappointing!
I thought my brother would break up with Neha so I could propose to her.
Father inspected his car and said, “You know this was my first car from my first salary.”
He almost choked on his emotions.
Pretty embarrassing, if you ask me.
I don’t want another dead man in the house… because of the car.
My mother smirked, looking at my father. “Good. At least now you’ll change the stupid car.”
“Don’t call it stupid,” my father barked.
“You are stupid, not the car.”
My mother gritted her teeth as she stared at my father.
Father stared back, gritting his teeth.
That’s frustrating… for my brother.
He can’t fix the car and my parents’ jaws simultaneously. It’ll cost him a fortune.
That’s frustrating again… because how will I steal money from him if he’s broke?
I placed myself between their stares. “Focus, Mom, Dad. You need to fix the car,” I motioned to my dad. “And you need to fix his marriage,” I motioned to my mother.
My brother swallowed. “Marriage? I don’t wanna marry.”
I smirked. “You should have thought about that before you thrashed the car.”
My brother creased his brows. “How’s my marriage related to the car accident?”
My parents mirrored his confusion. All eyes turned to me.
I explained, “Look, if you hadn’t screwed the car, you would have screwed Neha. If you had screwed Neha, I would have killed you. And when you’d be dead, there’d be no question of marriage. But since you thrashed the car, there is a question of marriage.”
I paused, wondering if I made any sense.
That’s sensible!
Now the visual image of my brother banging a girl will worry my parents… for life.
My brother scratched his head.
I swallowed my pride and guilt. “Unless,” I said, clearing my throat.
My brother leaned forward, his voice unsure. “Unless?”
My parents looked at me.
I shrugged and looked at my parents. “Unless either you fix the car or ditch your girlfriend.”
Mom and Dad turned towards my brother.
My brother’s eyes widened. “Why do I have to break up with Neha?”
I paused, looked at my parents, and then at my brother. “Can you afford the marriage and fixing the car?”
He shook his head.
“But..”
I looked at my parents from the corner of my eyes. “But I can help you. I have a solution that fixes everyone’s problems.”
Everyone gazed at me.
I pointed at my brother. “You fix the car.” Then I grinned. “I’ll fix your marriage… by marrying Neha.” I nodded.
“That way, Dad gets his car back, and Mom gets you to marry a girl of her choice.”
My brother’s eyes popped.
My father nodded in agreement.
My mother smiled in excitement.
That’s smart!
Now I don’t have to explain to my brother why I slept with Neha.
Enjoyed this absurd little mess?
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